I am shifting the conversation.
Join me as I discuss style on a deeper level as it pertains to confidence on and off camera, how we perceive our overall image and how that reflects the way we view ourselves as successful female business owners.
There it is. As women, I think we all have this fear on some level. It can be crippling, can’t it?
As a photographer, I see judgment in it’s ugliest form. Absolutely beautiful women picking themselves apart, asking me not to post certain photos, wanting to edit out blemishes that either can’t be seen by the naked eye or make them unique and stunning!
But I understand it. When Craig and I were married, I remember specifically emailing the photographer asking her if there was anything she could do about my double chin in many of the photos. She responded the same way I do now, assuring me how beautiful I was and that she didn’t even notice what I was pointing out.
So what will shift us away from feeling so uncomfortable about seeing ourselves on camera? I have been spending a lot of time thinking through this topic after working with so many amazing clients. I have come to some conclusions that I intended to start exploring with all of you.
This will be the first of many conversations, but here is what is on my mind today:
I feel like people assume because we are women styling comes naturally, but this is not the case. We are business-minded, driven, and focused. We have enough trouble balancing family, friends, and our business. We don’t have time to shop and if you are anything like me, you likely don’t enjoy it.
Instead, you shop about twice per year and you don’t go to a department store (which for me is torture!) You go to a store like White House Black Market where the sales associate asks your name and writes it on a whiteboard then shops for you. You end up trying on everything in the store until you find the four outfits that don’t make you feel completely fat, meanwhile, they have also picked out the shoes and accessories for you too. Although this sounds fun to some, it is time-consuming and exhausting, both mentally and physically for me.
How does this correlate to photography? When it comes to a photoshoot we are going to initially avoid booking one altogether because we have to face this wardrobe issue. Instead, we procrastinate and put it off. When we finally pull the trigger, we feel overwhelmed and probably wait until the last minute to figure out what to wear. Ultimately we don’t love what chose, leading to feeling blah about the photos we invested so much time and money in and not loving what we see.
CHANGE COMES FROM THE INSIDE: It’s not just about helping you pick out your clothes. I want to start a conversation and empower you over time. I want to build up to your photos so when you see yourself in those clothes you are proud of what you see and you don’t blink an eye. We are going to start by learning from the experts who will teach us how to style ourselves in a way that styles us on the outside and touches us on the inside.
Our overall image is our hair, our makeup, body image, yikes! There is so much! We are so insecure, there isn’t a person on the planet who isn’t critical about something. But let’s take it one step at a time. If we turn our focus on what we don’t like about our physical selves and shift our thinking into how it makes us unique in the world, how would it change our perception?
I didn’t grow up in an environment where I was complimented or told I looked good. Instead, I was constantly warned I was going to get fat, to watch what I ate, and always had eyes rolled at me no matter what I did or how I looked. Our history greatly impacts how we perceive ourselves throughout our lives, and I definitely struggle on a consistent basis with my own image, so I relate to you when you tell me you don’t like something in your picture. But also, please believe me when I say, I see your beauty because I have learned to see my own.
FORWARD MOTION: The experts are coming from far and wide on this topic! Girl, I have come to embrace the phrase “shake it if you got it!” from your beautiful shape to your curly hair! We can have so much fun once we zone into what makes you, YOU! I want to spend a lot of time talking about your image and how to enhance and NOT hide what you have to show. There is lots to say and so many women ready to speak out!
We know our stuff! We are calm, cool, and collected from the outside looking in. But when we get vulnerable with each other in our group coaching and masterminds we learn we are all suffering from imposter syndrome and all kinds of mindset issues that come along with not only being a woman but being a successful woman in business! It makes it hard to ask for help or admit we don’t feel inside the way we might look on the outside. We can put on a “power suit” but that doesn’t mean we “feel” full of power!
In order to capture your confidence beaming into the lens of my camera, first, we need to make sure you are confident and I explain all the reasons why I do what I do. When you get in front of the camera you already feel awkward and on display. Then you have me directing you, telling you to bend forward or contort your body into unnatural positions. It doesn’t inspire a lot of confidence in the process! This is why it is so vital we build a relationship, a foundation that ultimately will empower you not only during the hours we are together, but I believe our connection and conversations can have a greater purpose and carry over into other parts of your life or your business. It is learning how to nurture and grow through these relationships that gives us the most confidence over time and result in some of the most meaningful life experiences we could imagine!
SETTING THE STAGE: I have spent a lot of time educating myself in a lot of different ways both as a business owner and as a photographer. But one of the most pivotal and meaningful educators I have drawn from is Katelyn James who is a Wedding Photography Educator. Why you ask, would I educate myself through wedding photography? Because her message is about PEOPLE! It is about building relationships and my biggest takeaway in her lessons has been that she doesn’t want to just work with a client and deliver a gallery of pictures. She wants to build a relationship with each individual client and provide a unique experience just for them. She knows there is a greater purpose for her business at play and she pays attention to her why and that gives everything meaning. That deeply resonates with me and how I have focused my entire ‘Business Journey’.
And you are my why. It is about setting you up for success. I get to know and care about you and all aspects of you and your business not just what is on the surface. It is about feeling comfortable in your skin and getting the honor of telling your story with grace and confidence. By getting to know who you are, I get to know how to tap into what is going to put you at ease, shifting away from those insecurities and focusing instead on what makes you unique.
Inner confidence is deep and goes well beyond what we see in an image. I can’t wait to share more on this, I am inviting some special guests to really explore this topic more in-depth, stay tuned!